Cosmic Candles

Dear Diary,

Today, I think to you as I’m sitting with my hands in cuffs behind my back. It’s a nostalgic, if vile experience, reminiscent of old wars and battles fought by a different Kasimir.

You’re probably wondering why the present state of affairs has come to pass.

It all started with a Rabbi and a golem. The blessed bot nearly tore my head off, but I used the clay to track its master down, and let the local Warden handle the “diplomatic effort”.

Needless to say, Warden justice is not proactive. She let him go since no lawbreaking had been done yet. She let the Scheisseunfold go free! I should have known better. Cops can’t stop a murderer, they punish him afterwards. Problem is, justice never helps the victim.

Even so, I’d gotten a pretty good read on the Rabbi. He wasn’t a man of enormous power. He had to have a sponsor. All I needed that sponsor’s name.

I got home early the next morning.

“Oh Elsa,” I said as I passed her and Sam in the foyer. They were helping Hans pack for Germany. He was leaving tomorrow. “Would it be crazy if I summoned an Archangel for a chat?”

“God, Kass! You fucking crazy? What’ve you been smoking?”

One of these days, I need to clue her in. Her acuity is unbelievable and her discipline unwavering. A pity she wasn’t born Gifted. In ways, she reminds me immensely of Riley. The same measured, reasoning calm permeates them both.

I grinned at her and went downstairs, confident that I had things under control.

On ALAREC’s main monitor, I began to pull my notes on Engelnetz. I’d shelved the project in the 80s due to inadequate processor power and numerous stack overflow errors. Its purpose? To answer the auspicious questions: What’s an Angel’s energy reserve as measured in Joules? What’s their Wattage? How much energy to summon one? How much to trap it?

It took me most of the night to update the codebase and get the simulations back. By morning, I’d drawn up the Medium Circle with extra protective measures, cycled the energy into it, and empowered it with a force far in excess of its radius. I began the ritual.

At first I felt triumphant as Archangel Raziel’s corpus filled the circle to twenty, then forty, then a hundred percent of his projected output. And then it doubled, and then that tripled, and then that quintupled… you get the idea. It quickly dawned on me that I’d summoned a kleiner Gott.

It took everything I had to hold my calm, and I am a man known for no small reservoir of discipline. I managed to extract an oath that he’d behave as a guest under the Accords. Shortly after extracting the oath, I broke the my circle broke.

He then proceeded to behave in a most unguestlike manner.

He says he has slain God, and that he is the new God. He has a Messiah now. And before he left me, he told me the Rabbi’s sponsor. Chamiel.

So I am sitting, as of this thinking, handcuffed by a Warden, in the Circle Room of Gabriel’s Estate.

I hope that Hans and his morning flight kept Elsa and Sam at the airport while that happened… and that they got the nice werewolf’s text.

They bicker about me as I sit here shamed. But I hate shame. It has no purpose. And their bickering is but heatless smoke. As they argue, Raziel brings Levitican judgment upon the world. It must be stopped.

The White Council, as usual, squats in Edinburgh like a hibernating toad, and no stick will dislodge them from the Scottish mud.

It’s down to Suzanne, Gabriel, Manny, the werewolf, and a certified moron to stop Neo-God and Hitler-Jesus. I wish I’d not sealed Lanzettenblatt. Subtlety seems off the table in this scenario. Angels have no documented weakness either.

Wait. If Raziel has attack God, is he Fallen? Could he be cast into the pit? Do Fallen Angels have a different set of weaknesses and powers? I must ask the others when there’s a lull in the bickering. I wish I could reach my phone and remote into ALAREC, although my documentation on Fallen is about as sparse as my data on Angels.

UPDATE 1: I’m uncuffed. We’re going to summon another Archangel to fight it. Chamiel. The Hebrewser’s sponsor. I may be having a heart attack.

UPDATE 2: Well, we summoned him… He’s a little more forgiving than what we need, I think. We should have gone smitier. It’s not too late for me to call in one of the Big Four, is it?

On the upside, having now summoned two Archangels (two more than any other Wizard I’ve read of!) I’m convinced I made a math error.

Empirically quantified, Archangelic energy is on the order of Supernovae. Type Ia.

Somewhere, Ceiling Cat is mocking my small-mindedness.



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